Is College Admissions Pressure Peaking Earlier? Here’s What Parents Need to Know

Kids face pressure from so many different sources these days. Parents have to help kids finish all of their homework, specialize in a sport before the end of elementary school, learn to play an instrument, pick up a second or third language, and still find time to eat and sleep. On top of all that, social media and even our friends can make us believe that we have to start thinking about college admissions before high school even starts. But is this really necessary?

To determine what parents should really focus on, we speak with several college admission experts who paint a slightly different picture from what you may have seen online.

Do Parents Need to Worry About College Admissions in Middle School?

It may feel like the pressure is on to get ready for college applications earlier and earlier, but the experts we speak with say that's not really the case. While parents might be tempted to start building their child's resume to get into a top university while they're still in middle school, advisors say it's more important to get good (enough) grades, pursue their true interests, and find a school that's the best fit for the student, not just the top-ranked school they can get into. They tell parents not to stress too much or too early about the college admissions process.

“I am seeing families feel pressure earlier than they used to,” says Stephanie Meade, Principal and Founder of The Collegiate Edge. “In other words, I am seeing more early anxiety than early preparation, often driven by social media and the rapid spread of misinformation about what colleges actually care about.”

Here's what our experts say are the best steps for getting into college without the pressure.

1. Sign Up for an Appropriate Course Load Throughout High School

Some parents want to put their kids on a track with all advanced placement courses from their first day of high school. But experts say academics are not the only basis for a solid college application.

“It is useful to start thinking ahead in ninth grade, but early high school should be focused on building a strong foundation, not on a highly choreographed admissions strategy,” Meade says. “Ninth and 10th grades are ideal for developing strong academic habits and exploring curiosity in non-academic pursuits.”

The difference between an A in an accelerated course and an A in an AP course makes a minimal difference in GPA. However, a poor grade in a class that's too advanced for a student may make a big difference and could close the door to some colleges. Instead of focusing on getting the highest possible GPA, teens should develop their study skills and personal interests. This means more to colleges than GPA or test scores, says Daniel Kyong, Founding Partner at Educo.

“Heavy test prep early in high school rarely pays off,” he says. “Chasing perfection in GPA and course rigor also tends not to differentiate at the highest levels. Harvard could fill their class many times over with perfect SAT scorers.”

Experts discouraged test preparation before 10th grade. Instead, kids should be figuring out how they like to learn, what classes they enjoy taking, and how they learn best. These elements will ultimately help them choose which college may fit them best.

2. Explore and Find Something You Enjoy and Excel at

So if the answer doesn't lie in having the highest GPA or test score, how can students distinguish themselves in the college admission process? Experts advise students that the applications that stand out most often come from individuals who have developed a genuine interest in an activity or topic and taken the time to thoroughly explore it. This could be a sport, a club, or a class, or your teen may find their niche in volunteering or an after-school job. Parents can help by giving kids chances to try new things as they arise.

“Parents should give their children both space and opportunity: space to explore and discover what genuinely excites them, and opportunity to go deep once they find it,” Kyong says. “When growth is authentic, the application becomes a byproduct of that development, not a performance.”

He adds that with AI entering the college admissions conversation, it's easier to create a technically perfect application. With computers helping students write, applications can look very similar across the board. The ones that stand out are those that tell a story no one else can.

“They are looking for students who lean into something meaningfully, who try projects, fail, build again, and demonstrate authentic engagement with their communities rather than falling into cookie-cutter boxes,” Kyong says. “Strong applicants show depth in an area that matters to them, clear involvement in their communities, and experiences that shape their perspective.”

Instead of taking a test prep course after school or over the summer, students should consider volunteering, getting a job, attending a camp, or taking a class in something they've always wanted to learn more about. They may not find the thing that really drives them right away, but chances are they will find enjoyment and create more depth and breadth as a learner along the way.

3. Focus on Being Genuine, Not a Jack-of-All-Trades

College admissions are no longer about having the highest volume of extracurricular activities, especially if those activities aren't meaningful to the student. Instead of creating a laundry list of participation, Kyong suggests building a central narrative that includes elements like coursework, extracurriculars, leadership, recommendation letters, and essays that all support the story a student is telling about themselves.

“Every element should point toward a central narrative that's compelling and relevant to an admissions officer, ” he says. “What hurts applicants most is a résumé filled with disconnected activities, or worse, ones that are concentrated around junior or senior year. Today, depth and specialization matter far more than being a ‘jack of all trades.'”

Meade says that over-scheduling activities can actually be counterproductive. Spending time on activities a student doesn't really enjoy leaves less time for them to develop their interests and skills in the activities they really like. Spending a little bit of time on lots of different activities can be less valuable than exploring one or two passions that really help a teen find themselves.

“Students don’t need to ‘collect’ activities, but rather take the time to grow into true interests,” she says. “The goal in early high school is growth, not strategic résumé choreography.”

4. Find the College That is Right for You

Parents need to let go of the idea that only the most prestigious schools are worth the time, effort, or money they're going to put into their child's education. Instead of feeling anxious about getting into a highly ranked school or a university that everyone else is going to, students should focus on finding a school that is the best fit for them. This often means looking at schools that match their learning style, what colleges will allow them to pursue their interests, and where they think they will fit in and succeed.

According to U.S. News and World Report, there are almost 4,000 degree-granting institutions across the United States, and many of them have high acceptance rates, with some even accepting all applicants. Finding a college or university that fits your preferred location, size, budget, and offers programs of study that interest your kid is more important than the prestige associated with the school.

“Most colleges and universities in the US accept most applicants, and there are many campuses where your child can thrive and be prepared for a happy and successful life,” Meade says. “The critical mindset shift for parents is moving from maximizing outcomes to supporting growth, self-awareness, confidence, and well-being.”

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