You've noticed that familiar glow on your child's face as they hunch over a screen, in a trance, almost transforming into a zombie. They can't process what you're saying, or worse, they barely acknowledge you. And if you attempt to take the device away? Well, you're probably greeted with a meltdown, some eye-rolls, and maybe even a protest that feels way more intense than it needs to be. It feels like a losing battle.
Then comes the big question that many parents struggle with – how much screen time is too much? The short answer isn't exactly simple, but to help us answer that question, we speak with an expert, examine screens at school and home, and provide parenting tips on how to navigate screen time effectively.
What Do Experts Say About Screen Time?
©Emily Cherkin
We turn to Emily Cherkin, M.Ed., public speaker, consultant, and associate professor of public policy, and author of The Screentime Solution: A Judgment-Free Guide to Becoming. To learn what's best for our kids, we talk to Cherkin about the research behind screen time and tips on how to manage it as parents. You can learn more about her practice, The Screen Time Consultant.
Cherkin is a realist and knows that screens are a part of our kids' lives, but she likes to take an intentional approach. When screens are used, screens should serve relationships and never replace them. Cherkin explains that we protect our family values. As parents, we need to resist screen use that interferes with healthy development.
Here are Cherkin's key screen time points:
- Less is more
- Later is better
- Relationships and skills before screens
Screen time overuse is occurring at younger and younger ages. According to Common Sense Media's 2025 report, children under two average about one hour and three minutes of screen time daily, even though the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends avoiding screen time (except for video chatting) for children under 18 months. Cherkin says 40% of 2-year-olds have tablets. She explains that, from birth to age five, there is absolutely no need for screen time.
“They don't need screen time. They want it.”
Emily Cherkin, M.Ed., public speaker, consultant, and associate professor of public policy
Cherkin says that recent studies show 8- to 18-year-olds spend an average of 7 1/2 hours on screens each day just for entertainment purposes. That is the equivalent of a full workday spent on screens. And it isn't happening just at home. They are also exposed to EdTech at school.
According to National University, “educational technology, or ‘edtech,' is a hybrid of educational theory and technological innovation that has emerged to meet that need.” This means students are using computers for at least a portion, if not most, of their schoolwork. Cherkin has a big focus on EdTech on her site to help parents navigate this form of screen time.
The Hidden Dangers of Too Much Screen Time
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What is the harm of having kids having too much screen time? According to the American Academy of Child, balancing screen time with other activities is key to maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
What is the harm of having kids having too much screen time? According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, too much screen time may lead to the following:
- Less time learning other ways to relax and have fun
- Sleep problems
- Lower grades in school
- Reading fewer books
- Less time with family and friends
- Not enough outdoor or physical activity
- Weight problems
- Mood problems
- Poor self-image and body-image issues
- Fear of missing out
Excessive screen time can indeed be detrimental to kids for several reasons. Additionally, screens emit blue light, which can disrupt sleep patterns, making it harder for children to fall asleep. High screen time is also associated with increased anxiety, depression, and social isolation, as it limits face-to-face interactions that are crucial for developing social skills. Furthermore, prolonged use can cause digital eye strain and discomfort.
Constant stimulation from screens can impair attention spans, making it difficult for them to focus on tasks. Therefore, balancing screen time with physical activities and enriching experiences is essential for healthy development.
Here's What to Ask Yourself as a Parent
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What can we do when the whole world is geared toward screen time? Cherkin says that the amount of screen time that children are exposed to is not the parents' fault, but it is their responsibility to address it. Cherkin suggests considering three questions when choosing screen time for your children.
What do I gain by allowing the screen time?
The truth is that giving kids their tablets can provide parents with a sense of freedom to get things done. If the children are busy on their screens, then parents can pivot their focus to work, chores, or simply going to the restroom in peace. This is entirely valid, as it allows for moments of peace and the opportunity to focus on tasks without constant interruptions. However, it's essential also to consider what you might be losing in the process.
What do I lose, or what does the screen time displace?
When you allow screen time, it's essential to consider what that screen time is displacing in terms of time. Are those hours spent on devices taking away from activities that foster relationship-building? For instance, screen time may be replacing family meals, where conversations and connections are built. It could also be displacing playtime with siblings, which is crucial for developing social skills and emotional bonds.
What do I model with my own screen time behavior?
Lastly, it's essential to consider what you are modeling with your own screen time in front of your children. Are you engaging in activities like doom scrolling, where you mindlessly consume negative news and information? If so, this behavior can set a concerning precedent for how your children view and interact with technology.
The way you use screens communicates powerful messages about priorities and habits. What are you modeling with the content you are creating or sharing? Are you modeling healthy behaviors, such as using screens for learning, creativity, or connection, or are you demonstrating a tendency to get lost in endless scrolling and passive consumption?
Tips for Parenting with Screen Time
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As we parent in a world where screen time is the norm, several essential factors must be considered when guiding our children through this digital landscape.
Not All Screen Time is Equal
Cherkin says, “Not all screen time is created equal.” For example, she highlights that spending six hours on TikTok is fundamentally different from watching a movie or engaging with other forms of long-form entertainment. The distinction lies in how these different types of media affect our brains and overall well-being.
Short-form entertainment, such as TikTok, Instagram reels, and YouTube shorts, Cherkin likens to “dopamine snacks.” These bite-sized videos are designed to deliver quick bursts of gratification, often leading to addictive viewing habits. While they may provide instant enjoyment, they can also contribute to issues such as decreased attention span and increased anxiety, as viewers constantly seek the next quick hit of stimulation.
Cherkin further explains that this pattern of consumption can lead to a cycle of dependency, where individuals find it increasingly difficult to engage with longer, more meaningful content. Over time, this can reshape our preferences and diminish our capacity for deep focus and critical thinking.
No Phones in the Bedroom for Anyone
Cherkin recommends that no one in the family should have phones in their bedrooms. She emphasizes that this practice is imperative for prioritizing good sleep, which is essential for overall health and well-being.
The presence of phones in the bedroom can disrupt sleep patterns for several reasons. First, the blue light emitted by screens can interfere with the body's natural circadian rhythm, making it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep. This disruption can lead to reduced sleep quality and increased daytime fatigue.
Additionally, having phones nearby often leads to late-night scrolling or notifications that can disturb restful sleep. The constant temptation to check messages or social media can create a cycle of distraction, preventing individuals from fully winding down.
By establishing a rule that prohibits phones in the bedroom, families can create a more restful environment conducive to relaxation. This practice encourages healthier bedtime routines, such as reading, meditating, or engaging in calming activities that promote better sleep hygiene.
Discomfort is Okay
Saying no to screen time can be hard. However, it's essential to adopt a shame-free approach when navigating this issue.
Recognizing that many parents face similar struggles can help alleviate feelings of guilt or inadequacy. It's perfectly normal to feel discomfort when trying to establish boundaries around screen use. Whether it's the fear of missing out on trends, the pressure from peers, or simply the ease of handing over a device to quiet a restless child, these emotions are valid.
We can embrace the idea that it's a journey, not a destination. By openly discussing our challenges and finding support from other parents, we can share strategies and insights that make setting limits more manageable.
Alternative Choices
If parents need a break, and you know we all do at times, there are several effective ways to provide screen-free distractions for the kids that can keep them engaged and entertained.
One option is to provide audio materials. For instance, you can play music while they draw or color. Another great alternative is to introduce audiobooks. Audiobooks are available in a wide range of genres, catering to diverse age groups and interests. Podcasts are another excellent option. There are numerous podcasts specifically designed for children, covering topics such as science, history, storytelling, and even fun facts.
These auditory experiences can be both entertaining and educational, providing children with knowledge while keeping them engaged and entertained. By choosing these screen-free distractions, parents can make time for themselves without a screen.
The image featured at the top of this post is ©Prostock-studio/Shutterstock.com.